Zip Up and Move On
Date: August 2nd, 1999 @ 17:37
Bad fads die slow.
Notice to middle-America: Stickers of Calvin pissing on logos started out only marginally humorous and got old right about the time I saw the second one - and this was twelve or so years ago.
The biggest culprit is NASCAR. NASCAR pits racers and their teams and sponsors against one another. So to a NASCAR fan, the difference between Ford and Chevy is a religious issue. In that sense, it’s much like the difference between Baptist and Mormon - extremely important and worth writing about in tediously hair-splitting detail if you’re a member of one of the two “sides”, but inconsequential if you’re a sarcastic atheist bastard like myself.
In the last decade, Calvin has been busily pissing on anything with a logo, usually while mounted upon the back windows of sports cars and trucks.
Bravo, that’s so cool. Now grow up a little and realize that nobody really gives a rat’s ass about whether you bore your jackass redneck relatives with your generic humor about the car brand you “hate”. Again, much like religion, it has more to do with what your daddy drove than which is “better”.
A bumper sticker is not going to make you a better person. The Y2K Survivalist Bumper Sticker is as close as you’re going to get. At least, unlike all the “Calvin Pisses on a Logo”, “Jesus Fish” and “Darwin Fish”, the Y2K-S BSS won’t mark you as yet another sheep.
In fact, I have a r33t project for you!
Print out the Y2K-S BSS on sticker stock.
Get a Polaroid instant camera (either the traditional kind or the new disposable variety).
Find a police car.
Quickly, affix the Y2K-SBSS to the police car’s bumper, take a few pictures, and get away.
Scan the pictures in and mail them in.
You’ll earn my eternal gratitude (unless, of course, it ends up being fleetingly brief gratitude). Your pictures will be featured on r33t. You will admit nothing and deny everything.
Note: Don’t try this with a standard camera unless you develop your own film. Processing your film at a local store isn’t a good idea when you’re tagging patrol cars.
What disclaimer?
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